Juvenile Detention > Comments > "Review of Juvenile Detention"
Piece Comment
Commenter Profile
- Traci Tong
- Username: tjtong
- Location: Boston, MA
- Joined PRX: Apr 02, 2006
Piece Information
- "Juvenile Detention"
- Summary: A look at violence and other ongoing problems in The Baltimore City Juvenile Detention Center
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Review of Juvenile Detention
Traci Tong
Posted on December 12, 2006 at 04:41 PM
Story has great potential... but needs a harder edit.
Very fact-based and at times too overloaded.
Keep one thought, one main point per sentence.
Yes, you hear the voices of a former detainee, a youth mentor and an advocate but I would have like to hear a more personal story. Keep me caring about the subject.
Reporter has tremendous potential to turn this into a great piece if given the chance to work with an editor.